The Resolution in Real Life

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June 10, 2013 by Brian

OK.  We’re In.  But….how do these show up in real life?

We discussed and debated each of the “I Will” statements from the Resolution and tried to find out what each really means in terms of actions/decisions.  We got stuck on the very first one!  How exactly does one take responsibility for our wives?  It was instinctive to take care of their physical needs – food, shelter, protection, etc.  But does this mean we are responsible for their actions?  The conclusion was yes. How then, are we to handle it when our wives are acting in a way we don’t think is right?  Not many guys admitted to having the courage it takes to push back in that case, and usually just tolerate the situation, not wanting to create any hostility.  In the end, we mostly agreed that if you feel strongly about something your wife is/isn’t doing, it is your responsibility to let her know how you feel.  The hope is that IF your relationship is built on a mutual respect, your wife will honor your opinion, even if she doesn’t necessarily agree herself.  Yikes.  Admittedly, taking responsibility for your kids actions seemed a lot more attractive by comparison.  I guess that’s why these things take “courage.”

The next few were obvious and uneventful.  We spent a bit of time on the “Train Them (kids) to Honor Authority and Live Responsibly” clause. There was some common sentiment around teaching our kids how to stand up for what is right, and challenge authority when appropriate.

“Confronting Evil” seemed like it could be a full time job – and should come with a mask and cape (and superpowers).  Child abuse, etc., seemed to be an obvious call to action for most of us.  The general agreement was that our responsibility to confront evil was primary in our close circle of family and friends.  Once the people affected by evil were outside that circle, our responsibility was a little less clear.  More discussion is needed, perhaps.

There was no real pushback on any of the remaining items, though everyone’s interpretation/personal commitment on the exclusively christian resolutions will vary according to their own situation.

A quick round-the-room review of how the movie, Courageous, affected their lives that week was fascinating.  First – everyone was changed in some way.  If kids were still living at home, giving them priority and time over other distractions was a common change.  For those with daughters of a dating age, or approaching that age, the idea of making a pact with them about approving the “men” in their life was powerful.

For those without kids, there is a renewed focus on our role as leaders in our family.

And everyone was reflective on how they had spent their time with loved ones in the past and what they were going to do differently as a result of this movie.

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